Tales of a “GHETTO” Keto-Pescatarian

Wheewwww it’s been a minute since I’ve written about my new lifestyle but if you read my post from a few days than you know I’ve been super busy with life! But I’m back and ready to give y’all some encouragement and a recipe.

I’ll start with the food first. I made blackened shrimp in garlic Alfredo sauce with pasta zero noodles. I made this meal because my stepmom had given me the sauce but because I don’t care for Alfredo sauce I was tempted to throw it away until I thought of how to make it into my own. So I seasoned my $5 bag of shrimp from Walmart with blackened seasoning and some Boom Boom shrimp sauce that I also got from Walmart for around $3. I poured the Alfredo sauce into a container and added some old Bay and creole seasoning as well as some pepper. I let both the sauce and the shrimp sit overnight in the seasonings so it could marinate into deliciousness! I sauteed the shrimp along with some mushrooms and onions in some coconut oil and put it to the side. In making the pasta zero,I just followed the directions on the back of the bag. When the noodles were done,I added the shrimp and the sauce to it and added some parm cheese and y’all I was in GHETTO Keto-Pescatarian heaven! The various seasonings really popped in my mouth!

Know you know I’m not the one to lecture you if you’ve fallen off the Keto-Pescatarian lifestyle so just start over when you’re ready and set small goals that you are comfortable with. I’ll be the first to admit that I had a biscuit a while ago and I refused to feel 100% bad about it. I can’t say that I wish I hadn’t had it because I was hungry and needed something to eat while on my way to my training class. The key to that is not being hard on yourself for being human and figure out a way to make it up. You can fast longer than you usually would or exercise harder or longer the next day. Also,don’t forget to drink your water,keep a positive attitude,and only compete with what you did the day before.

I also encourage you all to talk to your doctor about taking a multivitamin because,in my opinion,it’s definitely needed the older you get. I can tell the difference in my body when I take mine vs when I don’t. When I don’t take it,my body just seems to lag leaving me feel like I have no energy and my mind doesn’t seem as sharp. Remember to always consult your doctor before making major changes in your lifestyle:diet, supplements, exercise.

Remember,if you can budget for that dress than you can budget for your health!

Life’s Challenges

I know it’s been a while since I’ve written but y’all a sista has been super busy. This virtual learning is kicking my ENTIRE behind. I promise I have an all new respect for teachers especially the ones who work with kids with any type of special needs! Anyway, how y’all doing? I decided to write on a whim because I’m a bit stressed. My plate is overflowing with responsibilities of life. I have a 5 year old who is ADHD with signs of autism,a 6 year old with GI issues,and I’m trying to save the world!

My 5 year old is the sweetest thing ever but she’s runs circles around us with her hyper behavior. In all honesty we knew something was different about her in comparison to all our other children (she’s the 8th in line) and when he preschool,her OT,and her ST pointed it out to us,we knew we needed to get her tested. We were hesitant because,as a whole, the medical community tends to label black and brown kids with ADHD more often than they don’t but we knew that we had to be more open-minded on this subject because of how she acts. As we figured,it was confirmed that she is indeed ADHD with hints of autism, although we still have to get her officially for that. We declined giving her meds but we did do some research and found that a lot of times ADHD and autism go hand in hand. Thankfully,we also have found some resources to help us with different things to calm her down and help her focus. She also has an IEP(Individualized Education Program)which helps us as parents and her teachers to set goals for her based on her needs. During the day or every other day,dad and I switch who sits with her while in class because she definitely drains us! LoL! We’re learning how to be the best for her, ourselves,and each other.

Our 6 year old was born having stomach issues. He has a very difficult time pooping on his own. At 3 days old he had to have a colostomy bag! He’s been in and out the hospital since then and now he freaks out whenever he sees a needle but at this point I can’t say that I blame him. We’re at the hospital right now and have been since 6am so he could have Botox shots in his behind. The reason being that we’re hoping it’ll help prevent him from tightening up when it’s time to poop. It seems like he wouldn’t do that,right? But because it’s painful for him to poop,he’d rather hold onto it than actually low it to come out. We have to give him prescription Miralax,ex lax,and magnesium citrate during those times of difficulty and more than once a day. Then we also have to put a pull up on him and have him lay on top of pads just in case the poop leaks out of his pull up which usually does happen. Now keep in mind we’re doing this with 6 other kids in the house,with the exception of one they are all doing virtual learning,we still have responsibilities in and outside of the house,and we still have to make sure our 3 year old has the attention he needs. Yes, exhaustion is not even the word for how we feel. This is the 1st time our 6 year old has had to come to the hospital during Covid-19 so he had to set the Covid-19 test done and that in itself was hard to deal with. Having something pushed all into your nose is horrible but then add that to a 6 year old who is already traumatized by medical procedures and you have a mess on your hands. Thankfully,the nurse did an amazing job and he didn’t cry too long. Also,dad is an amazing caregiver and was right there in the backseat with him to hold his hand and love on him. Dad is back there now caring for our son before and after the procedure. He’s such an amazing man,dad, husband and I’m so appreciative to him. Y’all, please don’t take the health of yourselves,your kids,and those you love for granted because it’s definitely a blessing not having to deal with hospitals especially during the times we live in.

Finally,saving the world! I volunteer for Durham Crisis Response Center,where I speak to victims of DV/SA over the phone. Initially,it was face to face at the hospital but Covid-19 has changed that. It’s hard to hear the stories of abuse at any level but I love knowing that I helped that person deal with that crisis in some type of way. Even if they just want to cry while on the phone with me,I just listen to them cry and offer words of comfort. I also part of an volunteer organization called Fayetteville St Corridor Fellowship. We focus on bridging the gap of communication between the predominantly black neighborhood and the city. So we inform and encourage that corridor to fill out the census,to attend city budgeting events, and we also are working on how to improve their mindsets. As far as the city goes we let them know that we can’t be included as a means to get grants but then are forgotten once the money is given. We also inform them of what our communites need vs what they think we need. It’s very rewarding because I love giving people hope when they feel their is none. I love being a voice for people who don’t have one! I also do 2 shows on Facebook live! One is with my sister circle where we talk about pop culture, politics,and everything else under the sun. We created the group,”A Tribe Called Women” for black women and women of color as a safe space to vent and celebrate. The other live that I do is with my husband and is called,”Life after the L Word” where we talk about anything dealing with relationships:love, co-parenting,racism,kids,bills, and everything else that involves different relationships. Y’all,see how I just promoted those two Facebook groups?! LoL! Make sure you join! My last superhero movement is training to become a licensed Peer Support Specialist! This is so important to me because it involves my passion:helping people. I want to be the person that positively changes lives. I have a saying,”your current situation doesn’t have to be your destination,” I came up with that because of my own life. I thought I was always going to be the negative labels that were put on me by my family and myself. I didn’t think I could be anymore than an addict or a baby having,non college educated,black girl with different baby daddies. Let me tell y’all,I’m so much more than that. I don’t have a college education but I have an education nonetheless. I’m no longer an addict,I’m in a healthy marriage,I’m working towards fulfilling my passion,and I’m in a better space. That’s what I want to bring to my clients:hope and success as they see it.

Life comes with so many struggles but within those struggles comes triumph. I’m so thankful and happy to those who take the times out of their day to read any of my blogs because you could be doing anything else. Believe it or not being able to write my thoughts,feelings,and opinions out and have people read them brings me joy especially when I’m feeling down. My kids come with a lot but they’re more than worth the frustrations,the aftermath,the lack of sleep,and everything else but they’re amazing and inspiring to me. Saving the world is what gives me drive and makes me feel like I have a purpose. I thrive in making a positive impact on all those I cross paths with. I get tired and exhausted but I’m here y’all and I’m not going anywhere!

Turning Point

I’m at this point in my life where I simply don’t have the energy to care. I find that I’d rather have that feeling than stressing over something beyond my control especially if it doesn’t affect my life. I don’t know what happened to bring me to this turning point. That’s not completely true….a lot of things happened. Let me tell y’all about it.

I think the sparkle of it can be traced back to my childhood. Having to deal with all types of childhood trauma both at home and at school is what I think started my path of not being bothered. Of course that thought process was more out of necessity than it was willingness so I didn’t appreciate it then as I do now. Out of necessity,I had to ignore the many forms of traumas in order to focus in school and in the streets. If it did or didn’t concern me,I had to not care because I had to keep it moving either way. I also couldn’t care because people are waiting for you to show signs of emotions thus weakness so they can use it against you. As I’m writing this I can’t help but feel bad for the girl and young woman that I had to be. Street life and survival are two of the hardest things for a black woman to go thru.

Another hint of a sparkle of not caring was once again at the unhealthy expense of myself. It was the relationships I had after coming from a traumatic childhood and before I got the therapy that I needed. I was so desperate for the love that I missed growing up that I didn’t care how horrible the love was. I didn’t care about being cheated on because “he came home to me” or because “I have his heart”. I’d ignore phone calls and text messages. I’d deal with excuse after excuse,lies after lies,and lack of responsibility because I cared more about being alone than I did being treated horribly. Y’all,I was a lost soul even more so because at the time I didn’t even know it.

Therapy is what helped me change my I don’t care attitude into something more positive. I learned not to care or give energy to things that caused me harm or things I couldn’t change. The turning point came when I had to deal with a situation that made me very uncomfortable but I couldn’t do anything about. When the situation first came about I was angry and my kids suffered behind it. I had a right to be angry because I had been wronged but I didn’t have the right to project it on my kids. When I decided that I no longer cared about this person’s actions or words over my own valid thoughts,I begin to realize I had the strength to control the situation more than I thought and so I did. This person’s words didn’t bother me ,it was nothing they couldn’t or couldn’t do that would get me out of character. It got to the point where this person tried to enforce their will on me just to upset me and when that didn’t work the person signed off on the situation and walked away. You see,my I don’t care attitude helped me to love myself more than I did wanting just any type of relationship. It became what I needed in a healthy way. I can’t change how someone acts but I can change giving them my energy. I can’t change being mistreated or even hurt but I can change the dialogue. We can’t change what’s not our responsibility to change,that’s for that person to do so but what we can do is change our perspective. We can claim our energy and we can claim our positive I don’t care attitude. We owe it to ourselves to do our best to create healthy boundaries and that means not caring or giving your life to something that is costing you yours!

Tales os a “GHETTO” Keto-Pescatarian

Welcome to another week of this “GHETTO” girls Keto-Pescatarian blog. How’s your meal prep, exercise,and overall feelings going? Let me tell y’all,we have 7 kids in our house and all them,with the exception of 1,are doing virtual learning. The older kids have it under control but the kindergartner and the first grader are definitely a challenge. Shout out to all of us who are holding it down with these kids!!

I’ll start off with what I cooked. Sunday is when I cook my Southern food. Even though I’ve changed my dietary lifestyle,I still love cooking my family good soul food. On Sunday I made smothered cubed steak,collard greens,and yellow rice for them and for me I had hamburger and gravy with a nice side salad and buttery cauliflower rice. The brand of “meat” I used is called Lightlife crumples that I got from Harris Teeter for about $4. I seasoned it and added an egg and some almond flour to hold it together. I placed the burger on the stove using coconut spray and let it cool until it was done. I then put it in the oven and topped it with some beefy onion season gravy and put it in the oven at 350 degrees for about 15 minutes. Y’all it was amazingly delicious!

My next meal is spaghetti and meatballs! I used Gardein brand meatballs,which are already seasoned to my liking and about $5. Instead of regular noodles I used Nasoya brand pasta which was about $3. I didn’t do anything spectacular with this. I followed the directions on the back of both products to make it and mixed the meatballs with the noodles and some spaghetti sauce. I usually use pizza sauce because it’s slightly less in carbs but I didn’t have any so substituted it. I added some parm cheese and had a side of salad (one of my favorite foods is salad) and y’all I was in Keto-Pescatarian heaven!

I know this lifestyle change is something new and challenging but it’s so worth it. I’ve lost a lot of weight and that’s with me having to stop working out due to homeschooling. I’m going to start back but I have to find the time to do so because y’all……it’s a battle with everything that’s going on to keep up with the health needs of myself but I will do it! Life is a journey of ups and downs and it’s how we react to the downs that keep us going.

Remember if you can’t budget for that dress than you can budget for your health!