White Fragility

It amazes me that black people are told to mute our feelings on racism because it makes others uncomfortable! Nevermind that these “others” have benefitted from our uncomfortableness for over 400 years. Why do we keep allowing them comfort at the expense of out turmoil? I’m not saying we should be a jackass because we can be but what I don’t understand is why we feel the need to sympathize with those who have made it known they wouldn’t do the same for us.

A while ago I had a conversation with someone who said that she believes All Lives Matters and that she was mad about George Floyd’s brother getting a folded flag because he hadn’t served although his death, sadly, was one of a huge sacrifice that he didn’t sign up for. It saddens me to know that she was more concerned about the flag than the human that lost his life. She did say that she didn’t agree with what happened but her 1st issue was the flag. I guess I would understand it better if I had served my country but at the same time so many black and brown people have served and are still treated like 2nd class citizens compared to their counterparts. Black and brown people have died for this country, have been traumatized for this country, have lost limbs and their mental capacity for this country only to be looked at as monsters and criminals. How can we All Lives Matter if time and time again and for over 400 years the lives of black and brown people have been hung, killed,pulled apart, damaged, and sacrificed with little acknowledgement when it comes to our counterparts. Where are ALM when we are gunned down? Where are they when we go missing? Where were they when our ancestors were jumping off ships and boats? Where were they when land was being taken, houses and business being burned, kids being bombed? Why didn’t they make noise when someone worshipped with church members only to turn around and kill them? Other than loudly spewing ALM whenever they see someone post BLM,what is it that they do?

I like to think I’m a well rounded, intelligent woman so I’m always mistified when someone talks about black on black crime as if all races don’t commit crime? What annoys me even more is the way people justify crimes outside of the black community. Telling me that white people commit crimes in lower ratings than black people does nothing for me other than make me realize just how far people will go to come out smelling like roses. A crime is a crime no matter who is doing it also people commit crimes within the area/community that they live which means white people commit crimes within their communities just as black people do, just as hispanics do, just as Asians do, etc, etc, etc. I mean,I don’t know how many of those communites outside of the white ones, commit mass killings in schools, movie theaters,malls, large gatherings, or churches but I’m sure they do….. I’d hate to generalize a whole group of people based on a few bad apples.

I mean,why do we,as the oppressed, have to go out our way to make others feel comfortable in either their racism or their lack of believing that it exists? Why are told to remain mute as if our silence is for our protection when really it’s for the comfort of others? When we’re silently protesting it’s uncomfortable, when we’re standing with our fists high in the air it’s uncomfortable, when we are peacefully protesting it’s uncomfortable…..it’s nothing that black or brown people can do to make the willingly uncomfortable people comfortable because they don’t want to be. They have become so accustomed to getting their way that when we continue to talk about our generational issues with systematic racism, they become defensive and instead chose to tell us to let it go or even more ironic they tell us how they were able to pick themselves up their bootstraps and make something out of nothing. What’s absolutely disgusting about that mindset is the thought that they ignore the huge fact that their skin color didn’t play a role in them having to pick themselves up by their bootstraps, their circumstances did. Black and brown people have to make bootstraps to pull themselves up with and then they have to watch as those same nothing to something counterparts with less qualifications are hired and promoted. Studies have shown that if you take a white person and a black person with the same credit and other financial history that the white person would still be given a better deal than the black person. So why wouldn’t that happen in the workforce, in the judicial system, in health care, in all aspects of life? Don’t tell us to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps when those straps are made of cloth and not leather.

Please don’t fake your comfortability in addressing racism by using your token black friends, black family members, black celebrities, or black personalities. We are tired of you telling us about Candace Owens, Ben Carson, Kanye, Hershel Walker, or any other black person who happily throws their black community under the bus for the approval of their counterparts. Understand that those people do not speak for the majority of us, in fact they speak for you which is why you can tell us all about them without hesitation. They make you feel comfortable in your racism and ignorance and so you become uncomfortable when a black or brown person loudly and proudly calls you out on your crap. I’m at this point that whenever someone brings up any of those names I roll my eyes because I already know where this “debate” is headed in fact most of us do. It’s more upsetting that we have to have that conversation over and over again and even more so we hate that those people are you constant go to when saying you’re not a racist.

We no longer care to make racist or ignorant people feel comfortable. You can’t keep hoping we will remain mute for your comfort. You should feel uncomfortable knowing that you have the intelligence and mental capacity to know that black and brown people are being treated unfairly yet to chose not to do anything about it. What should bother you, is your desire to be so comfortable that you prefer to remain silent than to possibly be shunned by your superficial friends, family, and whoever you feel emotionally in debt to. It’s ironic that your racism or ignorance is what’s actually causing us to become louder and thus reinforcing your uncomfortability. Being silent doesn’t keep us from being killed by those sworn to protect us nor does the police killing us make you feel uncomfortable enough to acknowledge that their is a problem and so we will continue to be loud, to be courageous, and to make you feel uncomfortable because “WE’RE BLACK AND WE’RE PROUD”

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